Job 6:9

That it would please God to crush me,

  To loose His hand and cut me off.

I bought one too many. I have this goal in my collecting to know what I have. I need a new goal. To make sure I look every time before I buy something to make sure I do not already have one. I used to think my brain could keep it all in order, but after twelve years of trying to be diligent, I still forget what I have, need to look it up, and do not.

When I read this verse, I think how silly it is to want God to crush or cut yourself off. I know mental health issues are terrible and affect many people many different ways, but I do not think Job was mentally ill, just he was having a bad time. The human situation balances the looney bin with the bogey man. How do we protect people from themselves and from others? It is a big issue and people are all different, so we often get it wrong or just do not try.

I used “please” over “be willing”, “consent”, or “deign” (assuming deign means submit or consent). I preferred the extreme of please over the lower consent as God needs to will it if we are to want it. One source did not use “crush me” and used “destroyed” instead, but I think he was basically destroyed already.

Among the rejected notions of repeating “that He would”, I also saw the verb phrase “let loose” that briefly was considered. I prefer the idea of the loosing to be God not using His hand to cut us off but letting go of His grip on us to let us be cut off. “Cut me off” was the main option, but sources also had ”crack me open” and “tear me apart” neither of which seemed applicable.

I met a minister on a recent college visit and told him about this study of Job. He remarked that Job is always a difficult read. Knowing that God was the ultimate author, I know that His intentions with the work are deeper than I will ever know and no matter how diligent I am about follow the lead of the Holy Spirit, there will be flaws in the outcome due to my errors in listening. My main goal will be to know more when I am done and to be able to use that to help others. My secondary goal is that maybe someone else reads it or parts of it and grows to feel more aligned to God. I hope it ends up a good read. I never really thought of it as a chance to help (or hinder) someone’s mental health, but I can only pray that God used it for His will and not only mine.